Use art my boy, it´ll make the medicine taste sweeter...
...Crystalline water, sharps knives piercing my body all at once, the adrenaline goes up, the nervous system´s down.
"Look mommy, a rabbit fell in the icy lake. Do they know how to swim?"
"I recall they jump, but they´re not made to live underwater. The poor thing will die, but they have strong legs, he´ll probably figure something out."
"I don´t know mommy, we better try to help him."
"Too dangerous now honey, there are cracks in the ice, you´ll fall and drown as well, too deep to go there now, too deep."
FIGHT RABBIT, FIGHT! YOU CAN DO IT! I BELIEVE IN YOU!...
...fight, Adrian, fight, I believe in you, sweetie, don´t give up on me, you hear? Everything´s gonna be alright...
"Where did I wake up?"
WELL, we had to bring you to the hospital, apparently you had some complications...
...I feel numb...
...THAT´S NORMAL, you´re stable now, but I´m so glad you´re okay...
I had a very intense dream. I almost drowned in icy water and I couldn´t get out, couldn´t even swim, how the Hell did I get out?
Ever since these visions had followed me I´ve been trying to figure out why are they so intense and painful. So , I escaped to the local library every time I´d the chance. I went from the work or Freud to Jung and if there was once thing that struck me like lightning was the unconscious mind was like an iceberg, as you went deeper, more feelings were discovered.
Though, this is such a repetitive, stupid dream, it seems like the little girl is the only one willing to jump and rescue me. And here I am, went from an icy, body piercing water into the ground and yet I feel like flying...
JUST BREATHE NORMAL,
Wish I could, feel like something is pulling me down into the lake again, they say my lungs are drowning as well, but it ain´t clear water, it´s more like a swamp...how the Hell do you get out of there using only what you have, have you ever seen a rabbit swim? I´ll have to learn using my hind legs...
I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE NICE FOR YOU TO HAVE THIS WHILE YOU HEAL...
...a sketchbook, how clever. Haven´t done this since the winter of '88.
"It´s funny that you bring me this, Edith, " I said. "Mother used to tell me it would help the healing process..."
YEAH, I KNOW, JUST PUT IN WHATEVER YOU FEEL, MIGHT FIND SOME IDEAS FOR YOUR WORK...
I think I already had an idea, teaching a rabbit to swim in the middle of a disgusting, oozing lake. It was even easier getting out of the frozen one.
I vilipended the cold days ever since they made me sick to the bone. That´s probably one of the reasons why I chose to leave Elyria, Mother grew so afraid as well, but Dad hesitated since most of our friends were there.
Luckily, I didn´t spoil the holidays, came back on time for Thanksgiving but I had to stay inside the house or avoid being exposed to the slightest breeze. Not much to do but just sit and watch. By then my black sketchbook was filled with all sorts of inner demons, it felt very much like a cleansing or an exorcism .However it was plagued with spirals, some crimson red, some black, using nothing but crayons.
Today I used lipstick, apparently didn´t have any other material to work with, or then again I could have always used my own blood, who knows. A rabbit fighting to swim out of a pool. I call it:
"THE POOL OF FEARS".
This should be a good piece. In the meantime, as I regained my breath I contemplated Edith on the sofa in a sort of fetal position, she didn´t take anything off. Her silky hair ran across her pale face; unfortunately she was a light sleeper and I woke her up.
GOD, WHAT TIME IS IT?, she said startled. 1:11 AM, what´s with that hour?
"Are you alright?" I asked.
YEAH, YEAH, I´M OK, HOW ´BOUT YOU, I CAN NOTICE YOUR FEVER WENT DOWN. Anything else?
"My head´s more wasted than ´anything else´. And yeah, I´m sore like I´ve been beaten up many times but other than that I´m feeling strangely better."
GREAT, YOU SHOULD BE OUT IN NOT TIME. JUST, CONCENTRATE ON HEALING, OK?
Art saves, it´s like a breath of fresh air, don´t you agree?
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