Trickster

"I hate this place," said Lisa to herself. "It gives me the chills."



It was around three AM. The hospital was barely inhabited by a handful of nurses and interns. She had no one to talk to except for an old man, probably in his sixties. He held a picture with his wrinkly spotted hands and kept saying in a very low voice, "Please be alright, Helen, and please be alright."


She had only thrown on a large burgundy flannel coat and was still dressed in her pajamas. She compulsively went through her pocket and had some change, her car keys and her smartphone.



The reek of disinfectant made her feel uneasy, "Don´t die on me, Adrian!"



And how could the world such a beautiful and talented little thing like him?



Unsure of the outcome she felt the need to call her mother who lived back in Elyria.



"I´m really scared," she began. Nervously she passed her fingers through her raven silky hair. "I don´t wanna lose him."



"Oh, dear," said Mom in a rather upbeat tone, "What can I say? From what you´ve been telling me I think he truly wants to die."



"Please don´t say that!" she cried, "You´re supposed to make me feel better."



"I never wished anybody any harm, so help me Jesus but if he makes it out alive he will need some kind of professional help. You can´t carry this cross all by yourself."



"You´re probably right; I´m just trying to find out why he would do something like this. I know how he can be under a lot of stress sometimes but this is bullshit."



"It´s late but think about what I said for the moment. That boy has always been a bad seed but who are we to judge?"



"Please don´t tell anyone about this yet, okay? We´ll deal with this."



"Who´s "we"?"



"Me and him. Thanks anyway; I love you, bye."



Lisa, Lis for short revisited the events of the previous night in her head.



Most of the time she took for granted that Adrian worked late inside his studio in private. But this time she noticed something wasn´t going quite right; he had a sad look in his eye all day and skipped dinner.



"Is there something troubling you?" she remembered asking.



"No," he said in a low raspy voice, "I´m just exhausted, that´s all."



"Well then you should go to bed."



"I´ll be upstairs soon."



Though he never said when.



She received a disturbing text message on her phone that said,



"Help me, I´m in Hell!"



And by the time she went back downstairs Lis found Adrian passed out on the floor and had traces of blood on his mouth and his hand.



She was beginning to get bored and decided to check the weather on an app,



38 degrees and cloudy.



"Great," she said in a lethargic manner, "at least it´s not raining."



It was the beginning of November and it looked like the winter would come in late for New York. Though these last months of the year seemed pleasant a snowstorm would hit by January.



December would be a busy if not chaotic year. Besides the usual hustle and bustle for the holiday season Lis was only interesting in delivering a new set of paintings with Adrian for a yet untitled solo exhibition. They had been working together all year.



It could have been the enormous amount of stress that drove him down a path of abusive behavior but Lis knew him best.



"Why is he doing this again, why?" she thought. Then she pictured that moment when doctor would come out with the diagnosis and started asking all kinds of uncomfortable questions.



She had become his partner in crime through the years and sooner or later no matter where or how he would get caught like a helpless little rabbit.



Except that this one was naughtier.



Suddenly Lis received a call from Daniel; the other roommate.



"Hi, what´s up?" she said timidly.



"The house is empty. Is Adrian with you?" he said desperately.



"Yes. We´re at the hospital, Saint Vincent...he wasn´t feeling well. I´ll explain later."



"Oh gosh, is it something really serious?"



"I don´t know; it´s too soon for a diagnosis. Don´t worry; he´s strong, he´s gonna make it."



"I think you already know what it is, you just won´t admit it."



"We´ll deal with that as soon as I get home, alright?"



"Fine! Don´t take it too personal. Take care."



The senior couldn´t help overhearing and asked very politely to the girl, "Is everything alright?"



It was very evident that she was sounding desperate and she was to blame now.



"Um, yeah," said Lis wiping the tears from her brown eyes, "I´m just having a hard time coping with this problem."



"First time here?" he said.



"Yes," she said as she sat closer to the man. The moonlight that went through the tall windows made it easier to see each other. He wore a beige coat and had a thin green scarf around his neck. He smiled with ease.



"The name´s Joe," he said as he shook her hands, "and yours?"



"Lisa but my friends call me Lis. It´s pretty catchy."



"Well, this is the tenth time I´ve been here in the last three months. My wife has lung cancer."



"I´m very sorry to hear that," she said.



"That´s alright. She´s been in chemo for a while and apparently she has improved but she had a relapse."



"Oh."



"She´s taking it rather well. She´s a fighter, I can tell. Helen is stronger than me," he coughed.



"I hope everything turns alright in the end unlike my friend..."



"If you don´t mind me asking what did he do?"



Lis took a deep breath, "He vomits frequently and not because he´s sick. He does it on purpose."



"You mean to say he´s one of them kids with eating disorders?"



"Perhaps. I just don´t want to come to that conclusion. I thought he was smarter than that, you know. Now they´re making me feel responsible for his reckless behavior."



"You can play the blame game for as long as you want but the problem will still be there."



"And that means it won´t solve anything, right?"



"He has to recognize he has a big problem and just solve it. That´s what life is all about."



"Thank you so much."



It was way past four in the morning. Joe was gone and Lis wished him well. She went to the vending machine using the few pocket change but it only had black coffee and she hated it all the way.



"Serves you right," she said in a low voice.



Finally a slender Indian man came out of the ward and found Lis.



"Sorry to keep you waiting so long," he began, "are you a friend, relative, girlfriend of Mr. Black?"



"Yes, no, I´m his girlfriend," she said hoping they wouldn´t ask her more intimidating questions.



"Listen. He´s stable now but he will have to remain here for a few more days; we need to make more tests. He lost consciousness due to an haematemesis which is when a person vomits blood."


"Damn, that awful. He´s always been very healthy except that he gets very nervous every now and then."



"He was dehydrated and he´s being treated with antibiotics to avoid any infection. We´ll see how he responds to that and if everything goes well he should be out in a few days."



"Can I see him now?" she asked patiently.



"Sure, I just need you to sign some papers."



Adrian was in a separate and small room with a view of the street. It was a little drafty but she didn´t mind.



He was turning twenty nine the following January; he was a quite androgynous goth boy with long jet black hair that went down to his shoulders, big expressive hazel green eyes, pale skin and fleshy rose lips. He was skinny alright but this time he took it way too seriously.



She took a seat and squeezed his hand.



“Hey, big guy,” she said nervously, “it´s me, Lis. You´re gonna be fine, I promise. I just don´t want you get hurt. It´s just that there´s something truly horrible that´s getting the best of you and I can´t compete with that. You´re so beautiful not only on the outside but on the inside as well. You don´t really need to change for anyone. Please wake up!”



“Lis…” he said in a lower voice.



Her eyes peeled and she smiled with ease, “Yes, yes it´s me! Oh my god, I was so worried.”



“What´s going on? Why am I here?”



“Um,” she said in a slow pace, “they had to bring you here because you were really sick.”



“Oh that,” said Adrian rolling his eyes, “I didn´t mean to scare you with that message. I was in a lot of pain.”



“I know, I know!” she cried.



“I had this dream and it seemed quite familiar and real."



“Don´t try to move too much.”



“How long am I gonna be here?”



“No more than a week.”



“Fuck,” he said.



“Listen, I´ve been discussing this with several people and you need help. This thing of yours has a spiraled out of control. Sometimes I wonder if I´m who´s putting you under a lot of pressure.”



“It´s not you, it´s…” he gasped.



“Hey, it´s okay; just breathe in and out, slowly,” she said as she pressed his hands. “Whatever it is we need to fight it. As soon as we finish this show you promise you´ll find professional help, deal?”



“Deal.”



“The doctor will be here in a few moments to talk to you in private. Just be honest; it´s much easier. Don´t be scared, you´re not the first one who´s had this problem. In the meantime I´ll pick up a few things from home. Is there anything else you need?”



“Thanks but no; you´ve done enough.”



“I´ll think of something.”



It was almost eight in the morning and the streets were somewhat crowded. Lisa took a quick cab to the building down Mercer Street. She lived with Adrian and Daniel on the last floor which several studio lofts; an area reserved usually reserved for artists.



A part of her felt relieved but another had some unfinished business.



The caretaker welcomed her as she reached the lobby, “Good morning, Miss Summers. Up so early?” he asked politely.



“Yeah, I had a little emergency, that´s all,” she said as she shook her coat.



“I just arrived but apparently there was a report to 911 in the middle of the night.”



“That would be me!” she raised her hand.



“Is Mr. Black alright?”



“Yes,” said Lisa nodding. “He´ll be fine; he´s just needs to take it easy from now on. Sometimes he works too hard and he has no schedule so you can imagine that.”



The middle-aged man laughed, “Yep, he is a bit, how do you say, eccentric?”



“But he´s human after all.”



“Have a good day, Miss!”



“You too, Leo!”



She wasn´t expecting Daniel to be awake at this time since he was a vampire himself. The guy was a notorious model and frequently took Adrian to his wild parties.



She wanted to avoid him but it seemed that one mishap lead to another and the day was just beginning.



A tall, buffed, slightly tanned twenty-year old with a Mohawk walked in as she entered the foyer.



“Girl, what happened? What´s going on with Adrian?” he said as he hugged her.



She went speechless because she was practically fed up and didn´t know where to start. “Take a seat because things are not gonna get pretty.”



“I told you so,” he said. “You didn´t want to see the truth but I did. It was so evident!”



“And why didn´t you do anything about it, huh?”



“I told him a million times he was going down a road straight to Hell but he wouldn´t listen.”



“Why is he doing this? I don´t know him anymore; he´s like a lost soul floating around and the only proof that he exists are his erie paintings."



“Let him explain to you all the nasty details. I swear this has nothing to do with you.”



“Oh gee, thanks! You just gave me something to chew on besides my usual responsibilities. Is there any other nasty secret you´re keeping from me?”



“Lis, come on; it´s not like you own him!”



“But he´s my best friend, remember? This is something very delicate; it´s not like having the flu. He could have died.”



“Maybe he didn´t tell you because he didn´t want to hurt you.”



“Ok, I´m starting to sound bitchy now, I need a break. Please lock up if you go out, I´ll be at the hospital for a while.”



She felt the need to go back to the studio which looked at that moment like the scene of the crime. Adrian´s phone laid by the couch and it was partially stained with blood. When she went for something to clean it up she found a red faux leather sketchbook wide open in his desk.



“He could have been working on some new sketches,” she thought, “but he didn´t tell me that either.” So she decided to take it along.



“I need some real food,” she said. The kitchen area was close to the studio so she went straight in to turn on the coffee maker; dark roasts were her usual poison. In the meantime she showered, out on some leggings and simple grey blouse.



As she cleverly managed to unlock Adrian´s phone she noticed that he didn´t finish an update for the last six hours and felt the need to send it. There was something odd; the text message he had sent to her phone went some minutes before and by the time she came downstairs he was lying on the floor. So apparently he was about to post this,



“I´m a rabbit in your headlights, scared of the spotlight, you don´t come to visit, I´m stuck in this bed.”



Sometimes Adrian used them as references for his paintings which had the element of the rabbit in them. She preferred to ask him for permission to post that later since it could be misleading.



“I hardly remember why I put this but it´s quite harmless,” said Adrian, so he posted it anyway.



He was in a much better mood and smiling. The sun was already up and it was almost ten AM.



“It´s part of a song; it doesn´t mean anything in particular. I just like the way it sounds; imaginative and mind-blowing. What do you think it means?”



“Considering today´s events it could be something to get really concerned about,” said Lis.



“It´s art, it´s an open question mark. Who wants to know the truth? You should already be familiarized with interpretation.”



“Yeah,” she said gloomily, “I suppose they already explained to you about your illness.”



“That is correct. I developed a condition known as esophagitis. It´s an inflammation that can cause pain of difficulty swallowing. Rest assure; I won´t throwing up for a long time. When we started talking more about it he said part of the problem comes from my mother´s side."


“How?”



“It´s all psychosomatic. It´s weird what fear can do to your body. I was tearing myself apart."



“But what´s so stressful about what you do? You weren´t like that.”



He sighed and rolled his eyes, “You seem like a nice girl but you´re a bit naïve.”



“Well I´m only twenty-five!” she cried."Why so much build up over this? Even Daniel made it sounds mysterious."



“I want others to appreciate what comes out of me and not to stop and look at me. My mind has always been more beautiful and it should stay that way."


"But you can´t help being attractive. Is it some sort of crime now?"


"No but it stresses me out. I curse the day they uploaded pics of me; it distracts me deeply from my work."

"Why is that so bad, sweetie?"

"Because it´s not them I´m attempting to impress and you are well aware of that. I want something else other than the term "pretentious" on the art reviews."


“Oh, I see. Critics can be tough but it depends who you really want to impress. I realize some of them are uber conservative but I think anything that has enough heart deserves a chance. Who told you were pretentious?”


“I doesn´t matter,” he said. “I take those comments and sublimate them into better work.”



“Which is a good thing, isn´t it?”


"You´re damn right is a good thing."


"I think you hate yourself so much but you know what? That act is so outdated it died in the nineties."


“What! No, that´s definitely not what I was trying to say.”



“Whatever! It´s fucking disturbing and I cannot afford to lose you. Now let´s see if you´re willing to eat something.”



“I can do it just fine," he said as he placed the tray, "You haven´t told my mom about this, have you?"



“No but knowing my mom she´ll end up telling her anyway."


"I better come up with a less gruesome version," he said apathetically. "She still thinks you´re my girlfriend.”



“What a terrible and beautiful lie," she said. "Whatever happened to the plain old truth?"


"Because she wants me to be happy just like everyone else. I´m her only son."


“Don´t you wish sometimes things would have been easier for both of us?”



“No, I´d hate to be like the rest. I would feel suffocated and would have committed suicide by the time I was thirty.”



“Why that age?"




"Oh come on, a lot of people have a life plan, do you?"


Lis paused and turned away. She didn´t appreciate that last comment and knew he was sort of cruel sometimes so she just smiled, "Yes. I wanted to help people accomplish things, making their dreams come true."


"That´s astounding, I guess."


"Hey, I was picking up some stuff around you workplace and I noticed that this was open."


Adrian examined the red sketchbook and turned to the last page to a drawing that made no sense.


"We agreed to deliver twenty-two pieces but there´s an additional one right here. "A Rabbit in Your Headlights," it says. What kind of joke is this? I didn´t make this."


"And I suppose you didn´t write that post either? You were probably hallucinating. Look, if you want to make another one it´s fine."


"Twenty-two is a good number. As in two times eleven."


"Oh, not those superstitious things again..."


"It´s called Occultism and works most of the time. This sketch is hard to make out anyway although it could have been automatic drawing. When the spirits are trying to use you as a medium you end up drawing this shit."


"The house is haunted?" said Lis crossing her arms.


"I´m just trying to explain the nature of things! Do you think I´m nuts?"


"No, Honey; you have a huge imagination and I absolutely adore that. Anyway, if the twenty-two samples are ready I´ll continue with our schedule and send them to Fiver´s assistant, okay?"


"Yeah. You know where the files are but don´t go fooling around my private folders. You´re a curious one."


"Oh, am I really?"


"Well, you already unlocked my phone; what else are you gonna do?"


"Your passwords are so easy to guess after being around you for more than ten years." She said goodbye to Adrian and kissed him on the forehead, "Sweet dreams."






The year was 1998 when he lived in Elyria, Ohio which is close to Lorain.


Adrian was about eleven years old when he had a revealing dream.


In it he was walking down a snow covered road which surrounded the emblematic Black River. In January it turned into a fascinating wonderland filled with frozen cascades but it was certainly not a safe place for a kid to explore.


Some creature brought him down there; a large black rabbit with fiery eyes who jumped and moved with ease from side to side. It finally jumped down to a hole in the ice and disappeared. Adrian peeked into the hole carelessly and made a horrible discovery; the body of his grandfather on his mother´s side.


It was just a nightmare and he was too scared to tell anyone however a few days later his bad dream came true. His Grandpa Joe passed away of a fatal heart attack. He was only sixty-five.


A part of him felt responsible because somehow he anticipated it. Ever since then he became obsessed with Death and try to find answers on websites and books but it only made things worse. The only reasonable cure was found in art; to channel all those feelings into something creative. And when he wasn´t satisfied with his creations he took them to a higher level; a reinvention, the flower that bloomed amidst the snow, a dark mystic creature.


He had made that picture of the ugly dream he had but threw it away years ago. Something was trying to remind him that it was still important and therefore forced him to put in the sketchbook.


Adrian cried in silence for he hadn´t gone back home in ages, "Now I´m the one stuck in this bed."


-------------


Those enigmatic lyrics resonated on the social networks. Soon a lot of followers began to draw their own conclusions about Adrian´s mysterious post.


Lisa was fooling around in the afternoon around five thirty on her tablet when she suddenly started reading all sorts of disturbing comments while other recognized the song in a matter of seconds.


"Great song and amazing video by UNKLE!" said one of them.


"Why, what happened, bro?" said another.


"If you´re feeling blu I know how we can get cozy." said another


"Where are you?"


"There he goes again driving everyone crazy with his riddles," said Lis. She was at small coffee shop in Tribeca where she was to meet with Edith Paige; a graphic designer recently graduated from NYU. Lis had contacted her several months ahead for she knew well the advertising came out first.


Edie was two years younger than Lisa. She had long dark hair, milky freckled skin, bright blue eyes and a quite Southern accent. She dropped out of Psychology and jumped into the applied arts for unknown reasons.

She was introduced to Adrian Black at a collective in Chelsea and said she was simply charming.

Edie entered the shop wearing a large floral dress, long beige boots and a kind of baby blue shawl.


"Hey!" she said giving Lis a great hug. "How have you been?"


"Oh boy..." she said as she threw her hands over her face. "I´d like to say that this wasn´t my week but that expression is so outdated so I guess I´ll have to come up with a new one."


"And so is being pessimistic," said Edie.


"Believe me it´s not."


"By the way, I read Adrian´s post and I couldn´t help following it for the last hour; what happened?"


"Oh, nothing; he´s being doing that lately to fuck with people´s minds for a while. Only a few know the actual truth. I heard the plain white coffee is great here so I already ordered."


"Great. Is there some viral campaign going on I´m not aware of?"


"God no! It´s not a weekend movie. The work speaks for itself. I may got to Hell for this because I swore I wouldn´t tell more people but..."


"You can trust me."


"He had a little household incident and he´s in he´s been in the hospital for the last three days."


Edie froze, "Lis, you gave me a mini heart attack. What was it?"


"He´s just been under a lot of stress lately."


"Oh, I´m so sorry. Do you think we should postpone?"


Lis made a sharp look, "No, why would we?"


"That sounds kind of harsh. You don´t mind if I pay him a visit one of these days, do you?"


"Don´t worry; you´ll get to see him real soon. So you´ve brought a mock up of the poster?"


"Yes, the one he chose." said Edie sipping on her coffee. "He said to keep it uniform yet raw and emotional because like you said, the work speaks for itself."


"He also told me to stick with the Helvetica. I don´t what it is, you have a huge catalog of beautiful fonts and we end up with something that looks so sterile."


"Actually it´s because it´s so much easier to read and less trendy," said Edie, "he gave an entire speech about it."


"He did? When?"


"A while back."



Edie recalled the first time she went to the studio on Mercer Street. There was music playing in the background, "Would?" by Alice In Chains. He kept his favorite albums from the nineties on vinyl. The sound quality was always exquisite and provided a much better atmosphere for working.


He sat on his desk looking serene and tired.

"Come inside; I know you´re in there," said Adrian. Black was his signature color hence the name. Besides his usual morbid attire he wore a thin black choker; he said it focused all the attention on his neck.

"This place is gorgeous but what´s with all the darkness?" asked Edie.


"I have a slight headache," said Adrian as he rubbed his right temple. "Mortals call it hangover."


"You´re very funny."


"And you´re very pretty, hipster pretty to be exact," he said, "So you´re the new intern."


"That´s right!" she said as they shook hands.


"Did you know that we have much in common, Edie?"


"Do we?"


"Hell yeah we do!" He breathed heavily , "We came out of the same college."


"Oh!" she laughed, "That´s great. But I guess you came out several years ago."


He smiled openly.


"What?"


"Nothing. You came by yourself?"


"Well yeah, that was kind of the point, wasn´t it?"


"True, silly me. I´m only going to explain this once." He started walking towards the room and showed her other posters that were done for previous shows and the all had the same font; Helvetica."

"Do you know why I chose it from the start?" he said.

"It´s your trademark," said Edie. "It´s recognizable and easy to read."

"Not to mention universal," he added. "It´s everywhere and it works. Period. But did you know Americans designers found it controversial because it stripped all ornamentation?"

"I guess. You don´t like calligraphy fonts?"

"No. This is timeless. The chaotic part is me. The lettering is representative of this city as well. Say you´re going down to the subway during rush hour and you find this huge multi-colored strip of people going in and out, an effect which can be achieved with photography. The contrast between the order and the chaos is what´s evident in my work. Opposites, duality, Ying Yang, black and white."

"That is so deep."

"Don´t you forget that."

"How could I?" she smirked, "especially coming from such a cute guy like you?"

"Yeah, don´t worship me; worship the art. I´m flattered anyway."



"So his presence had a huge impact on me it was impossible to ignore," said Edie, back in the coffee shop.

"Helvetica for the titles it is, " said Lis,

"And for the invitations. I would have gone with the calligraphic ones."

"Orders are orders."



The raven boy finally came back home from the hospital on a Friday. He felt his ego had been slightly crushed for getting caught with this type of self-destructive behavior. The shadow of shame pursued him for he found it pointless to be responding comments on the social networks.

He had become another statistic, another victim of the modern age. His collection of paintings on the other hand would become some sort of redemption.

And through this path of pain he found pleasure. That afternoon while in the depths of his studio Daniel stopped by and welcomed him with open arms.

"Hey, you sweet thing!" he cried, "I missed you so damn much," he said as he continued giving a steamy open mouth kiss.

Adrian stood still.

"What´s the matter?" said Daniel in a weary voice.

"It´s just that I feel so weirded out after being away so long. I even had several fucked up dreams where I was being cut open and force-fed and shit."

"Are you sure it wasn´t real?"

"I don´t know what´s real anymore," he said as he sat down on the leather couch. Perhaps it´s the sleep deprivation, the meds, the lousy food."

"I told you that was bad shit. I had friends who did exactly the same thing and then you know what happened?" said Danny. "They died. I can´t let you go like that."

"Strange, if you don´t run away easily from things like these then I guess you really love me."

"Of course I do." He kissed him again more passionately then he found his neck and that was thrilling.

"You´re very tense. Let me help you with that."

Adrian stared into his lover´s eyes and whispered, "Go down on me, slowly."

"That´s it?"

He just nodded. Next they took the big leather couch and began to make out.

Daniel hastily removed Adrian´s black top and ran his tongue across his pale chest then concentrated on his rosy nipples. This made him writhe like a snake.


"That one´s new. You never did that for me. That tongue of yours is wonderful."


"You´re getting hard, I can tell. It´s so easy."


"Do me, suck me, suck me hard."


"You´re so delicious. Every last part of you is desirable."


"Really?"


"No, but isn´t that what you wanna hear?"


"Maybe."


"Then let´s continue. Man, that is a major hard on."


"What are you waiting for?"


"I wouldn´t know where to begin, perhaps right there..."


Adrian shut his eyes firmly and gave into the moment. He thought that no one could really have him and that he was like the White Rabbit, the object of Alice´s obsession; always on the run but never caught except for Daniel.


"Fuck. I´m coming..." he panted.


The pain was gone for a few seconds feeling almost like exorcising demons. Then he opened his eyes slowly.


Adrian looked from side to side, "What did you do with it?"


"I swallowed it like a good little boy," said Daniel wiping his round lips.


"Oh man, that was really intense." Adrian pulled his pants up and laid on his side. He began to sob.

"I´m sorry, baby, was it too much?" asked Dani concerned.

"No, actually you did so well I felt relieved. You´re much better than any drug. I have to take them anyway. What time is it?"

"I have no idea. You hardly keep any phones or watches around here."

"They distract me." Daniel got up and went the computer to check the time but it was locked.

"Um, password please?"

"Ah, dammit! Let me do it."

"Say, when are you gonna give me password privileges like Lis?"

"Until Hell freezes over. Are you kidding me? There are things more valuable than you in there."

"So much for the love."

"Seven-thirty. It´s time for drugs."

"I gotta go," said Daniel, "I have this event at the Grand Soho full of extremely beautiful people, are you sure you don´t want to come?"

"No, I´m drained but thanks anyway."

"I´ll see you real soon in bed."

"That´s cool. Lis will be home in just a few minutes so I´m good for the night."

"Take care." Daniel grabbed Adrian by his waist and kissed him goodbye.


There was a staircase in the kitchen area that was connected to all of the bedrooms, which were four but only three were occupied. They were thinking of renting the last room but they set that for a later date in the future.

Adrian went upstairs to bathe and put on some warm clothes. He disliked the idea at first but took it well since he was a stay-at-home kind of guy.

Lisa had been in the gallery all afternoon and arrived pretty much exhausted not wanting to speak to another human being. She took off her burgundy coat and hung in the closet next to the foyer.

When she saw her best friend all her troubles went away.

"Hey, Lis!" he cried as she hugged her tightly. "I was waiting for you."

"That´s very sweet, " she said, "you smell nice too. So where´s Danny?"

"Away, it doesn´t matter, " he said, "I´m not supposed to drink, remember? That´s why I didn´t go out with him."

"I don´t wanna go out either; this cold gives me the blues. Have you had dinner yet?"

"No."

"Oh good. Let me see what I can get you unless you wanna follow that strange diet chart."

"Maybe it´s better to stick with it in case anything happens."

"Well, since when did you become more self-conscious?"

"When you told me that I hated myself."

"I´m sorry, big guy. I didn´t mean to bully you with that comment."

"No, no, you made it very clear."


The kitchen had a combination of rustic and modern. Even this area had gloomy colors and it was dimly lit.

Lisa took away from the industrial-size fridge a clear bowl filled with non-flavored Greek yogurt.

"Now, in case I´m not around here you just remember to take these with something easy to swallow."

"Oh good," he said maliciously, "does cum count?"

Lis couldn´t contain herself and laughed out loud, "Are you serious?"

"Yeah. I do it all the time; I just wanna know if it´s safe in my condition."

"I guess so but slowly it would be best."

"Ah, got it." He poured the contents of the pills and started to mix them carefully. "I wasn´t that hungry anyway. Actually I wanted to apologise."

"For what?"

"For being a bastard all these days. I may have lots of talents but being nice is not one of them."

"I forgive you. You´re a beautiful and flawed creature of which I´m proud."

"By the way this thing is very good, where do you get it?"

"In that market down Houston Street as well as this cheap white wine."

Adrian laughed, "I should teach you how to drink."

"I learned that one time at Kevin´s place back in high school, you do remember him?"

"I sure did."

"He was your first conquest."

"I had no idea he was into me. I wasn´t planning on hitting on any guy until I left for college but he insisted. His friends however wanted to see me dead and that´s when I heavily got interested in witchcraft. I wanted some kind of talisman to protect me."

"It was tough, wasn´t it?" said Lis sipping more wine, "and for me as well. I followed you to the bottom of that rabbit hole and I didn´t find a wonderland exactly."

"But it was sure fucked up."

"It still is. Now I don´t know when I´ll be getting out of it."

"You can leave whenever you want, kid. You´ve been a great assistant and if you feel the need to grow I won´t stop you."

"Thank you but I like working for you and I want to see how far you can go perhaps until you become an international product."

"Oh, that will definitely happen."

"Did you see that on your cards?"

"No, it´s just common sense. Come with me, I´ll show you a great place."

"Lead the way."


The studio reflected much of Adrian´s personality. He loved to get messy every now and then and underneath all that chaos there was a bit of organization.

Since he had a lot of space it was divided into two sections. The first one a metal bookshelf with all his sketchbooks, some of them in different sizes and predominantly red. There was another next to it where he kept his paints; mostly acrylics, oils, solvents and primers. There was also one had rolls of unstretched canvases, makeshift palettes, mason jars with all types of brushes.

Finally there was a large drawing melamine table with dozens of different cutting knives, metallic rulers, curve rulers and stencils.

The traditional media contrasted with his digital tools consisting of a large, dated bed scanner, a laser printer, a stained laptop and a desktop PC which was connected him the universe. The walls were intact though since it was forbidden to modify, probably just hang.

Adrian was in love with the past; among his favorite things were some posters featuring Basquiat and Warhol, surreal pictures of Man Ray and minimal art.

The other end of the studio was mainly for leisure and inspirational material. He also had a small projector and a box full of film canisters which according to Adrian were authentic snuff and porn films of the seventies. He always said they could come in handy someday.

He seldom left the apartment except for minor errands. That didn´t mean entirely he was a loner. He had already made friends with some of the most important people in the New York art scene which he invited most of the time.

That night Lisa was about to witness the result of six months work. Adrian´s paintings were plagued with the use of the rabbit in all sorts of contexts. She knew about those references he made to the White Rabbit and to the macabre Black Rabbit of Inle, all taken from children´s books except for one original creation; the Red Rabbit of the Infinite Strength.

This last one was fashioned the day he discovered his sexuality. It had large ears almost like devil horns, wide almond-shaped eyes and the infinite symbol on its forehead. He figured out if the supernatural was to follow him then why not use it for a good cause.

At first he made it out of clay but then made a wooden one. He kept in a small metal box for years.

Adrian walked around his studio trying to feel more secure.

"I suppose you know what a triptych is," he said to Lis.

"A set of three paintings," she said carelessly.

"True however this time the collection is divided into three stages. I drew some inspiration from the numbers in the Major Arcana from 1 to 21 except and the 0 which would result in 22 pieces. The 0 represents the Fool; the beginning of our journey.

The Fool was renamed is "Home"; when we step into the rabbit hole. It´s not always pretty down there and it looks more like a smelly old basement full of junk."

The first stage is where we see the White Rabbit; the one who´s always late for everything, obsessed and a kind of perfectionist. The individual who is subdued possibly to a feminine figure. In my case it would be the shadow of the mother who is attempting to fit me in a world in which I don´t belong. She passes her fears onto me, putting me in a cage."

"Fascinating," said Lis as she sipped more wine.

"But I wasn´t meant to be caged so I get startled, uneasy, sick and disgusted of my prison so I resource to self-destruct."

"The black rabbit?"

"No, that one comes in the end. This one is a frequent visitor though. The helpless white rabbit is always afraid the other will come to take him away too soon. He´s a shape-shifter and disguises as Death, failure, illness, poverty.

In order to face this impostor he must expose himself. It´s the only way to stop hearing those voices at night."

"And then the next stage is getting naked. That explains why they are all in red. He becomes raw and emotional. He´s passionate and genderless; he takes off his coat that reeked of innocence and is open to love. It´s still unsure where this takes us, there´s no plan."

"Which is life, pretty self-explanatory."

"And in the end comes Death. It will come someday, that´s for sure."

"I would call it cutting the umbilical cord in an elegant way. It´s relatable so it works. What do you call this?"

Adrian sighed, "Trickster, as simple as that."

"That´s all I needed."

"You´re not setting a good example, Lis. You´re getting a little wasted in front of me."

"Come on, it´s Friday! I´m allowed to."

"Are you also allowed to be sadistic? Do you still remember when I took you to that concert?"

"Which one?"

He pointed to her black and white t-shirt.

"1998. That was the time when you wanted me to get acquainted with the roots of goth and if I recall it was the second time I saw you dance."

"I´m not a good dancer and you know it."

"But you can still move!"

"Alright, challenge accepted. I think I have a vinyl right here." He opened a cabinet and took out "A Slight Case of Over bombing" and waited until "Lucretia, My Reflection" was playing.

"Come on," he said as he pulled up Lis from the leather couch. Adrian wrapped her arms around his waist. He was notably taller than her, roughly six feet.

She felt his warmth, his tight embrace. She whispered unconsciously, "I´m so glad you´re okay; I don´t wanna lose you just like that."

"I was scared too, Lis," he said, "I feel like I´m a goddamn funeral. No one has died; it´s some kind of collective sadness. People we care about are taken from us too soon."

"Yeah, we need more "hellos" instead of more "goodbyes".

"You sound tired, kid."

"Aw, I´m fine," she slurred, "you´re so soft and cuddly. Are you gonna stay down here?"

"I believe so or until Daniel gets back so we can begin Act Two."

Lis laughed for a while. "I thought you said you fell drained."

"What am I gonna do without my poison?" he said referring to his usual dosage of alcohol.

"Screwing, maybe?" answered Lis, "which is something I never managed to do with you."

"If you did you´d totally ruin our friendship and our partnership."

"Okay now I really gotta go; it´s getting too weird for me in here."

"Allow me."